This post is by Jane Healey, author of the The Saturday Evening Girls Club.

“It’s a big world out there. It contains so many people with so diverse opinions. Go out there and find your tribe, find your kindred spirits. It won’t be easy, but it can be done.” – Emma Watson, actress

Emma Watson recently gave a young girl this advice during her press junket for the release of Beauty & The Beast last month. Watson’s words about finding your tribe resonated with me on so many levels – as a woman, as a mother and as a writer.

I have two daughters, the oldest is thirteen. Middle school has not exactly been a picnic (really, is it for anyone?). My daughter is not in the popular crowd. She’s very artistic and plays the ukulele every day at recess. She loves her banana yellow Converse high tops, and steam punk jewelry and designs her own t-shirts. The phrase “beats to their own drum” was made for kids like her.

She has about 80 days left of middle school and she is so over being a middle schooler. She is both excited and terrified for a fresh start at a new high school – in a new town where there will be a whole new crop of kids to meet. When she was moody about this impending milestone in the car the other night, I told her about Emma Watson’s advice. I told her that she just hadn’t found her tribe yet, but that eventually she will. I explained to her, “Your tribe is those friends, that as soon as you meet them you feel like you’ve known them your entire life.”

I’ve always believed in the importance of female tribes – of finding like-minded women friends who are strong and loyal – who support and lift each other up. Your tribe is the friends that really “get you” and understand what makes you tick. They celebrate your successes and are there when you fail or fall apart…or both.

In high school, my tribe was the group of friends that stemmed from my first day of field hockey practice freshmen year. In college, it was my sorority. In life now, it is a loose network of old and new friends – some I grew up with, some I’ve met professionally and some I met when I became a mom. Of course, as a writer, I have found my tribe of writer friends that, like me, are somewhat introverted and more than a little obsessed with the idea of telling stories, no matter how hard it can be some days.

A few years ago, I fell in love with a certain story of a group of women in Boston’s North End at the turn of the 20th century. They were young, poor immigrant women whose families were from Russia and Italy. They formed a group called The Saturday Evening Girls Club and started a pottery shop to raise money for the club’s activities. Through this club and its mentors, these young women achieved much more than society expected of them: some of them finished high school, some went on to college, some became entrepreneurs. This tribe of strong, supportive women is the subject of my debut historical novel. The Saturday Evening Girls Club changed these women’s minds about what was possible, and, in turn, changed their lives forever. And I believe that is what the best kind of tribes do for women.

If the young women of the Saturday Evening Girl Club could find their own tribe, despite the harsh circumstances of their lives, I have faith that my quirky 13-year-old will eventually find hers. As Emma Watson said, it may not be easy for her to “find her kindred spirits”, but I know it will be worth it when she finally does.

How did you find your girl club?

Share in the comments!