Lynn Alsup watched, powerless, as her one-year-old daughter, Clare, newly arrived from Haiti after adoption, crawled the length of their house in a frenzied search for her lost mother. She crouched on her bed—pillow clutched over her head—as four-year-old Clare wailed in the next room, triggering Lynn’s own trauma. During Clare’s elementary years, mirrors crashed and shattered in shards on the subway tiles of their bathroom floor and she scored doors like tigers gouge trees. And as she and Lynn walked hand in hand through their neighborhood just before she turned thirteen, Clare calmly detailed her plan to kill herself.
Over the course of these years, Lynn and her family journeyed through psychiatric hospitals, along the Appalachian trail, and in and out of residential placements. Lynn’s marriage, faith, and sanity barely survived the ride—until she finally learned about Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder (FASD), the source of neurodivergence in one in twenty American children, and discovered the Neurobehavioral Model, a strengths-based approach to neurodiversity. That discovery transformed both her and her family.
At times joyous, at times harrowing, but always full of love, Tinderbox is a mother’s story of unrelenting resilience, hope, and love.
